Wishful Canvas: Misery

Dear Hope,

It has been quite a while since my last letter to you. I’ve been busy and that is what that scares me the most, being busy and not having time to write to you. Sorry for keeping you alone and lonely. I promise to always keep you accompany. I survive campus life so far although as usual there are ups and downs, yeah, shit happens. Not much you can do about it, so, take a deep breath and curse your lungs out.

I live to play or I love to play? That has been a question I asked myself lately, and, up until today I can’t really figure it out which one is the one. Since the first day that I am back to Shah Alam and meet with my beloved friends and housemates, I have spent most of my time with either Mr. Sunshine or Miss. Moonlight. The world is my playground.

"Unless each day can be looked back upon by an individual as one in which he has had some fun, some joy, some real satisfaction, that day is a loss."

Do I get tired? Of course, because most of the time, I am the one who do the driving. To be frank, sometimes I hate driving, it’s tiring, I need to focus on the road and to drive carefully, either to take care of my car or most importantly, the persons who are in the car with me. I don’t mind do the entire walk, the run or the scream, but, I hate driving, not all the time but sometimes. Lately, I’ve been sleeping quite early, almost every day I will sleep before midnight, which I am not usual to do so. I guess it maybe because of the fun, too much fun that I had during the day.

The internet connection in Shah Alam is quite bad. It may because I live on the ninth floor, I am using broadband by the way, and because of that, I get fed up of the slow moving internet and I usually won’t go online and therefore, I’ll write to you less. In addition to that, I sleep quite early where the internet usually gets faster in the early hours, but, by then I was already in my sweet dreams. When I am in my own home, I can’t live without the internet but when I am in Shah Alam, I don’t really bother with the internet. It’s a good thing so I won’t get distracted and I get do other things better but the problem is that I didn’t do anything better, I sleep. (sigh)

"In between goals is a thing called life that has to be lived and enjoyed."

What is next for me? More and more fun. To be honest my fun might not be on par with anyone else’s fun. My definition of fun is lame. Yes, lame fun. I am not a fun person. I rather sit at home and doing nothing rather than go out and have fun. So, why more fun for me? Am I mocking myself? Screw it all. As long as I think it is fun, then, it is fun to me. To be truth, the fun would actually starts tonight.